One Backyard, One Dream
August 15th 2008 03:49
Here's an article I wrote that was published in the Brisbane Courier Mail on 8/8/08.
Have a fun weekend!
It all starts today. As tonight’s opening ceremony kicks off the 2008 Olympics with traditional dancers, kung fu fighters and spectacular fireworks, the Chinese are promising the “best games ever”. For the next 16 days the eyes of the world will peer through the smog to witness the spectacle of the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games.
The lead up has been a rough ride, plagued by anti-government protests, the devastating Sichuan province earthquake, large-scale ticket scams and a monumental battle against air pollution and blue-green algae.
Now it’s time to get down to the business of sport.
As events unfold in the Birds Nest, Water Cube and 29 other official venues, we’ll gather in pubs and cheer from home as our Aussie Olympians swim, throw, ride, row, jump, run, hit and dive into sporting history.
Only the lucky few who’ve secured genuine tickets (and have successfully interpreted Chinese visa requirements) have made the 9,000km trek to join the bezillion Chinese fans cheering from the stands.
But you can do the next best thing at home!
Bring the spirit of the Olympics to your own backyard and revel in the sporting prowess of your family and friends. You may not have competitors to rival Leisel, Cadel and Tamsyn, but you can host an event to rival a trip to Beijing and who knows, you may have an unsung sporting hero among your nearest and dearest.
Here’s what you’ll need.
A torch. For the torch relay of course. A battery-operated torch is fine. Stand to attention and sing the national anthem as your chosen delegates hold the torch aloft while jogging proudly around the yard.
While your torch may not visit five continents on a monumental 137,000km journey, you should be able to avoid the violent protests that followed the official torch relay. Also, being battery powered your torch is unlikely to be extinguished, accidentally or otherwise, before it reaches the stadium.
Nations. Team up participants by family, gender, age, whatever. You could become immersed in the Olympic spirit of participation and harmony, or you could whip up some healthy (or ruthless) competition between teams. Make up chants and team songs that can be bellowed with gusto as your team goes for gold. Have each team adopt the uniform, mascot and (exaggerated) accent of their chosen country. When allocating uniforms please note that Uncle Barry probably won’t look as good as Natalie Cook does in a beach volleyball bikini.
Sporting Equipment. Leave professional sporting equipment to the professionals and use what you have on hand. For the sprints you’ll need a ribbon, rope or similar for a finish line. Use beer or soft drink cans for relay batons, any kind of ball or kickable object is fine for soccer and if you have a backyard sandpit it can host the long jump and wrestling. A great steeplechase course can be made with lawn furniture and a blow up pool. Weightlifters can pit their strength against water filled eskies, aspiring Lleytons can have a bash at totem tennis and if you have a pool you’re all set for swimming, diving and synchronised swimming events.
There are 28 event categories being contested in Beijing including trampolining, basketball, badminton, hockey, table tennis, volleyball and shooting (water pistols anyone?). Your Olympic spirit is limited only by your improvisation skills.
A BOC Official
At least one Backyard Olympic Committee member should be responsible for enforcing rules, keeping track of event results and adjudicating during disputes. Arm them with a pen, paper and power of attorney and influence them with flattery and beer.
A Medical Team
It’s a good idea to have a first aid kit on site. While disqualifications should be enforced for crash tackling or otherwise hampering rivals, competitors may suffer minor injuries due to poor coordination, excessive enthusiasm or general lack of fitness. Or all three at once.
A Camera. With over 20,000 accredited media bringing Beijing events to the world, you can’t have a backyard Olympics without some kind of journalistic coverage. Appoint someone as the official photographer and sports commentator. Then replay your Olympic glory for time eternal, and torment family and friends with enduring proof of their less than graceful memorable moments.
Chinese Takeaway Menu. To create the illusion that you are in fact competing in Beijing, have participants chow down on chow mein, spring rolls and special fried rice. Flat duck and chicken feet may be optional extras.
While Olympic Village inhabitants bow to an onsite ban on booze, you can wash down your wontons with a few coldies. If you’re feeling adventurous try the crisp and malty Tsingtao Lager, China’s bestselling beer.
The Olympic Spirit. Chinese officials are promoting the Beijing games as more than just a sporting event. Locals have embraced the opportunity to welcome foreigners with Olympic volunteers training in languages, etiquette and social graces. As we gather to support our Olympic heroes, the Chinese are hoping to convince the world that there’s more to their country than pandas, pollution and human rights controversy.
In the spirit of past games, the 2008 Olympics aim to encourage global friendship, peace and unity of culture. And there’s no better place to start than in your own backyard.
One World, One Dream, One Backyard. GO AUSTRALIA!
Have a fun weekend!
It all starts today. As tonight’s opening ceremony kicks off the 2008 Olympics with traditional dancers, kung fu fighters and spectacular fireworks, the Chinese are promising the “best games ever”. For the next 16 days the eyes of the world will peer through the smog to witness the spectacle of the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games.
The lead up has been a rough ride, plagued by anti-government protests, the devastating Sichuan province earthquake, large-scale ticket scams and a monumental battle against air pollution and blue-green algae.
Now it’s time to get down to the business of sport.
As events unfold in the Birds Nest, Water Cube and 29 other official venues, we’ll gather in pubs and cheer from home as our Aussie Olympians swim, throw, ride, row, jump, run, hit and dive into sporting history.
Only the lucky few who’ve secured genuine tickets (and have successfully interpreted Chinese visa requirements) have made the 9,000km trek to join the bezillion Chinese fans cheering from the stands.
But you can do the next best thing at home!
Bring the spirit of the Olympics to your own backyard and revel in the sporting prowess of your family and friends. You may not have competitors to rival Leisel, Cadel and Tamsyn, but you can host an event to rival a trip to Beijing and who knows, you may have an unsung sporting hero among your nearest and dearest.
Here’s what you’ll need.
A torch. For the torch relay of course. A battery-operated torch is fine. Stand to attention and sing the national anthem as your chosen delegates hold the torch aloft while jogging proudly around the yard.
Nations. Team up participants by family, gender, age, whatever. You could become immersed in the Olympic spirit of participation and harmony, or you could whip up some healthy (or ruthless) competition between teams. Make up chants and team songs that can be bellowed with gusto as your team goes for gold. Have each team adopt the uniform, mascot and (exaggerated) accent of their chosen country. When allocating uniforms please note that Uncle Barry probably won’t look as good as Natalie Cook does in a beach volleyball bikini.
Sporting Equipment. Leave professional sporting equipment to the professionals and use what you have on hand. For the sprints you’ll need a ribbon, rope or similar for a finish line. Use beer or soft drink cans for relay batons, any kind of ball or kickable object is fine for soccer and if you have a backyard sandpit it can host the long jump and wrestling. A great steeplechase course can be made with lawn furniture and a blow up pool. Weightlifters can pit their strength against water filled eskies, aspiring Lleytons can have a bash at totem tennis and if you have a pool you’re all set for swimming, diving and synchronised swimming events.
There are 28 event categories being contested in Beijing including trampolining, basketball, badminton, hockey, table tennis, volleyball and shooting (water pistols anyone?). Your Olympic spirit is limited only by your improvisation skills.
A BOC Official
At least one Backyard Olympic Committee member should be responsible for enforcing rules, keeping track of event results and adjudicating during disputes. Arm them with a pen, paper and power of attorney and influence them with flattery and beer.
A Medical Team
It’s a good idea to have a first aid kit on site. While disqualifications should be enforced for crash tackling or otherwise hampering rivals, competitors may suffer minor injuries due to poor coordination, excessive enthusiasm or general lack of fitness. Or all three at once.
A Camera. With over 20,000 accredited media bringing Beijing events to the world, you can’t have a backyard Olympics without some kind of journalistic coverage. Appoint someone as the official photographer and sports commentator. Then replay your Olympic glory for time eternal, and torment family and friends with enduring proof of their less than graceful memorable moments.
Chinese Takeaway Menu. To create the illusion that you are in fact competing in Beijing, have participants chow down on chow mein, spring rolls and special fried rice. Flat duck and chicken feet may be optional extras.
While Olympic Village inhabitants bow to an onsite ban on booze, you can wash down your wontons with a few coldies. If you’re feeling adventurous try the crisp and malty Tsingtao Lager, China’s bestselling beer.
The Olympic Spirit. Chinese officials are promoting the Beijing games as more than just a sporting event. Locals have embraced the opportunity to welcome foreigners with Olympic volunteers training in languages, etiquette and social graces. As we gather to support our Olympic heroes, the Chinese are hoping to convince the world that there’s more to their country than pandas, pollution and human rights controversy.
In the spirit of past games, the 2008 Olympics aim to encourage global friendship, peace and unity of culture. And there’s no better place to start than in your own backyard.
One World, One Dream, One Backyard. GO AUSTRALIA!
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