How much help is too much help?
May 27th 2010 01:32
If it weren't for my wife, I never would have passed pre-calculus in high school. She obviously wasn't my wife then, but we were in the same class. She had it in the morning, though, and I had it in the afternoon. Every day during lunch she would help me with my homework, basically giving me the answers, and I passed the class with a B.
Thank goodness my job doesn't require pre-calc, because I have no idea how to do it.
Why? Because she helped too much. I didn't actually have to learn calculus because she showed me how to do everything. I put virtually no work into it-I learned the process well enough to pass the tests, and promptly forgot it.
This happens a lot with parents and their kids. I know I'm guilty of it, though I try not to be. Either in the interest of speeding things along, or because he seems to be getting really frustrated about something, I do things for my son instead of teaching him to do it himself. It's also a problem I run into at work-it's sometimes hard to find the line between helping just enough and helping too much. Sometimes it's obvious whose parents have helped too much-the awesome science fair project that the student seems to know virtually nothing about, the perfect essay from the student that can barely read. Sometimes you don't realize the student isn't doing the work until a quiz or test comes up. Then you find out that without help, they have no idea what they're doing.
Helping your kids with their homework is great. Just make sure that when the work is finished, they've done most of it and know how to do it on their own. Same goes with tying their shoes or pretty much anything they need to learn. Teach them the process, but then have them do it on their own as much as they can. It may be frustrating for them, but they'll learn much faster from doing things on their own. I know the “If you give a man a fish” saying is overused, but it's accurate!
Thank goodness my job doesn't require pre-calc, because I have no idea how to do it.
Why? Because she helped too much. I didn't actually have to learn calculus because she showed me how to do everything. I put virtually no work into it-I learned the process well enough to pass the tests, and promptly forgot it.
This happens a lot with parents and their kids. I know I'm guilty of it, though I try not to be. Either in the interest of speeding things along, or because he seems to be getting really frustrated about something, I do things for my son instead of teaching him to do it himself. It's also a problem I run into at work-it's sometimes hard to find the line between helping just enough and helping too much. Sometimes it's obvious whose parents have helped too much-the awesome science fair project that the student seems to know virtually nothing about, the perfect essay from the student that can barely read. Sometimes you don't realize the student isn't doing the work until a quiz or test comes up. Then you find out that without help, they have no idea what they're doing.
Helping your kids with their homework is great. Just make sure that when the work is finished, they've done most of it and know how to do it on their own. Same goes with tying their shoes or pretty much anything they need to learn. Teach them the process, but then have them do it on their own as much as they can. It may be frustrating for them, but they'll learn much faster from doing things on their own. I know the “If you give a man a fish” saying is overused, but it's accurate!
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